That stupid bitch!

[Rock]

**NOTE: IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN MAGNOLIA, DO NOT READ THIS POST**

Ok, The Rock was busy, and he wanted to give himself a few days to calm down before ranting about this. After the self-imposed cooling off period, The Rock is still hot. About what you ask? Here goes.

On Friday morning, The Rock was up getting ready for class enjoying a cup of coffee and some toast. Flipping around during SportsCenter's commercial, he saw that Florence Henderson (the Brady Bunch mom) was, for some odd reason, the one discussing movies on The Today Show with some dude from Entertainment Weekly. They talked about Oscar contenders, newly released movies like The Hurricane and Man on the Moon. In the course of the discussion, Magnolia was brought up. And sure enough, that stupid bitch ruins the final minutes of the movie for anyone who hasn't seen it.

Here is how it went: She starts talking about how good Tom Cruise, and the rest of the cast was in it. The guy from EW starts talking about how brilliant the film was and the likelyhood of a nomination for Cruise, and other aspects of the film, were in regards to Oscars. Then, good ol' Florence went from being a woman to really pissing The Rock off and metamorphising herself, in The Rock's mind, into a complete stupid f*cking bitch in about 2 seconds. She says, "And I just have to say...the frogs: Wow!" The guy from EW, knowing that she just ruined the movie for anyone and everyone who hasn't seen the film, knowing that she just robbed most of the audience of the pleasure of being surprised, looked startled and went speechless. About 3 seconds of dead air and blank stares later, he pipes in with, get this, "Yeah, without ruining anything, let's just leave it at 'the frogs'"

Without ruining anything?!?! WTF?!?! Nice cover by the EW guy, but she totally ruined it! There was no going back or being sly about anything after that. Again, nice attempt by Mr. Entertainment Weekly, but to no avail.

Now, The Rock has seen the movie, so it didn't ruin it for him. But, it is just the principle of the thing. And, The Rock never likes to call any woman a bitch, but in this case she acted like a stupid bitch. Sheesh...like mentioning 'the frogs' would not ruin the surprise. Everyone is talking about some surprise, thus any half-way intelligent person could put 2 (her mention of the frogs) and 2 (everyone talking about there being a surprise) together. Only funny thing was the EW guy knew she ruined the entire movie, or the punchline at least, for anyone unfortunate enough to have not seen the movie but that was watching or that was in the audience.

Yeah, that's the analogy The Rock is looking for. If you will--P.T. Anderson's film is like a joke. He is telling his story, or joke, and before he can get the punchline out, Florence FREAKIN' Henderson jumps in and says, "Oh, I've heard this one" and ruins it for everyone involved. We've all had that done to us. She did it to the collective masses. Stupid bitch.

Sorry...probably nobody else saw this, but The Rock just had to get up on his soapbox and let off a little steam.


DVDFile.Com Moderator
LucasP@Wabash.edu

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WWF SmackDown! is sports entertainment featuring trained professionals. If you try these moves at home, you're a complete jackass who deserves the paralysis you're undoubtedly risking.

[This message has been edited by Rock (edited 01-19-2000).]

[Hendrik]

...and by letting off steam through relating this story, you have just totally and abysmally ruined the ending for the thousands upon thousands like me who visit this site, who didn't see that TV show, but who were looking forward to seeing the movie and being surprised, and who now, after reading your tirade, see no reason to go see the movie...

! !

Hendrick, The Rock did post a warning... Anyway, don't let that little bit of info deter you from seeing this amazing movie. It's not a complete spoiler, and the movie holds so many delights for serious movie goers. I myself had that bit spoiled by reading too much on another message board before I saw the movie, but the movie still worked for me and the scene in question still had incredible impact. Go see it!

And Rock, I have the ultimate spoiler story for you. This is from the dark days before the Internet - 1983, in fact. It was opening day for Return Of The Jedi. I was a young software engineer a few years out of college. Like every card-carrying geek at that time I had been waiting for three long years for the resolution to Empire Strike Back's cliffhanger and other unresolved questions. A bunch of us had made plans to check out of work early and hit the lines at our local theatre. I was pumped for this flick as I had never been before, and have never been since.

Now, my morning routine always includes reading the newspaper, in this case the Houston Chronicle. I skimmed the local reviewers' take on Jedi, not concerned about spoilers because this reviewer has always been good about not giving stuff away. No problems there. I had just finished the comics, and turned to the back page of the entertainment section. There was an article about the Star Wars phenomenon. I can't remember if it was written locally or picked up off the wires, but the headline is forever burned into my brain:

"Leia Is Luke's Sister"

The headline!!! The f*#%in' HEADLINE!!!

Never has there been a more blatant example of journalistic irresponsibility.

It's been over 16 years, and I am still pissed off about this!!

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Too many DVDs, too little time...


[This message has been edited by Craig S (edited 01-18-2000).]

[This message has been edited by Craig S (edited 01-18-2000).]

[Taxi]

Hendrik, when somebody tells you not to read something, and you read it anyway, what do you expect?

I haven't seen Magnolia yet, so I haven't read the Rock's post. It was that simple.

[Will Munney]

Well, that's not really a spoiler Rock since the frogs are what was on the teaser poster. But I guess that's not exactly the same as a national TV broadcast.

I agree on Jedi, except it was my cousin who spoiled it. He got to see it before I did, so when we went he started telling me all the secrets before the movie started.

[TampaFlyer]

> who now, after reading your tirade, see no reason to go see the movie

That would be doing those folks a favor.

well, It just goes to show you. WHy have Mrs. Brady as a "Journalist" on a major network television show without ethics. When I first heard that she was going to be on Later Today, I didn't think it or she was going to last. Mabey, after this little fuck up, the producers will finally show her the door.

Personally, I think that she should stick to her infomercials and stay away from live tv.

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It's safer than a tubesock

[jb523]

Doesn't bother me terribly. I find that a good film can't be ruined by already knowing the plot. Only mediocre films or films that hinge on a single plot twist like Usual Suspects can be ruined, but a good film can't be spoiled by knowing the ending, unless the only/main reason you're watching the film is the thrill of watching the plot unravel.

[micahp]

Leia is Luke's sister?!??!
AAAHH crap!

Now I have no reason to see Jedi at all...
Gee, Thanks.

Actually,I think florence should be flogged. Really.

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Resident Me,
Micah P.
Digital Dreams

I went to see "Empire" the day it was released to avoid spoilers and while in line there was some @sshole there spilling the beans about Luke getting his hand cut and Vader being lukes Father and I damn near beat that man.
Unfortunately I had bought a collectible "EMPIRE" comic and refused to read it until I saw the movie a few days later and I just happened to pick up the comic on the right page to the spot where vader says " I am your Father" so I kinda ruined it for myself.
But What kind of BONEHEAD stand out in front of a theater and talks about what he read ???

And finally this you may find humorous.My brother used to spoil movies by telling you a part.He'd say "Just let me tell you this ONE part" and it would be like the best part of the movie.
So now I tell him right away,"Dont tell me any part of the movie" and he usually replies no matter what the movie,"I wont tell you anything except everyone dies at the end" which we usually use as a standard line now.
But the worst ending he ruined for me was Private Ryan.

(DONT READ ANY FURTHER SAVING PRIVATE RYAN SPOILER)

I asked him if he saw SPR,He replied "yes" and I asked him how it was and he replied "It was great until Tom Hanks Died at the end"
I thought he was joking until I saw it and then I got pissed,after which I proceeded to email the end of every movie I saw after that! He never ruins movies for me anymore!



[This message has been edited by Joe michaels (edited 01-18-2000).]

[manigrasso]

...Rosebud was his sled...

[Taxi]

---

...Rosebud was his sled...

---

Damn! Now I'll never be able to watch Gone With The Wind.

[Rock]

Hendrick, The Rock is so so sorry about that. Honestly, The Rock feels really bad. How ironic, huh? You know, that The Rock was ranting about Florence ruining Magnolia and The Rock ended up ruining it for you. Man...dude, again, sorry. Yes, The Rock had put a spoiler warning, so it isn't his fault, but he does feel bad for you. It really troubles The Rock to know that he, even if mildly, spoiled the punchline of the movie.

Trust The Rock, though, the movie is not totally ruined. It is such a great film that even though you read The Great One's post, you will still enjoy the movie, guaranteed. It is such a terrific piece of work, enjoyable on so many levels, that you still owe it to yourself to go.

What The Chosen One will do is edit the post and increase the font size of the spoiler warning so that if anyone else happens upon this thread, they will not make the same mistake you did. Yeah, that doesn't help you any, but it is all The Rock can do at this point, and not being the source of spoling the movie is of the utmost concern to him.

Craig S...sweet Lord almighty! That has to be the stupidest freaking paper, editor, and writer to ever put pen to paper. Good Lord...how could they do that?!?! Man, unbelievable. The Rock really feels for you there, and doesn't think it is wrong for you to still be pissed.

Will...yeah, The Rock knows the frogs are on the teaser poster, but you don't necessarily think about that while watching the movie. But Florence's statement was made in such a way as to obviously give away a key portion of the film.

Zackys...HA! Yeah, The Rock may not fire her if he was in charge, but she'd certainly be on thin ice.

JB...yeah, The Rock said as much in his first post. That is, the entire movie was not ruined, and you can enjoy in so many other ways that her spoiler was not as bad as it could have been. But still, she ruined a neat little surprise because she is a dumb, useless bitch.

Micah...HA! Flogged...now that would be something to see. Oddly enough, The Rock's dad has some personal hatred, or extreme dislike, of Florence. Don't know where it comes from, but no matter. So, when The Rock related this story to him, he said it only supports his feelings and theory that she is a piece of monkey crap. Well...The Rock is paraphrasing there (cause he didn't really say 'monkey crap'), but you get the point.

**WARNING, IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN CITIZEN KANE, DO NOT READ PAST THIS POINT**

Manigrasso and Tax-man...HA! Though, thing is, while that was really funny, The Rock just saw Citizen Kane for the first time the other day. Even though you wrote that ambiguously, if The Rock hadn't see it and were to see the movie later, he would probably remember your post and be pissed. HA!


DVDFile.Com Moderator
LucasP@Wabash.edu

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WWF SmackDown! is sports entertainment featuring trained professionals. If you try these moves at home, you're a complete jackass who deserves the paralysis you're undoubtedly risking.